The Beautiful Necessity

I am planning an overhaul of my apartment. I am equipped with two things-- a copy of Apartment Therapy (an 8-step "home cure") and my Pre-Raphaelite imagination that wants to drown in William Morris patterns. Clearly, I am aware of the limitations of this dream, but it's a starting point, nonetheless.

So... that's what I'm thinking about today.

It has been a busy week. On Friday I spent the day with Sesame, the new love of my life. BigSis and I took her to the doctor for a shot and a weigh-in. She was up to 5 lbs, 7 oz, and the doctor was pleased. On Saturday night, Narc and I went to see a production of the new "Woyzeck" at BAM. Nick Cave did the music, it got a decent review, and it was staged with flying trapeze artists and tubes of water. I was looking forward to it, but unfortunately, it sucked. Big time. Narc was pretty woozy that night, as well, as he had been out drinking the night before. He has barely had anything to drink since his blood clot scare back in June, so his tolerance is way down. He ended up with a gash on his shoulder and a bruise on his side, the size of the palm of my hand. Afterwards, we got takeout and lounged at his place.

Yesterday I had coffee with Hammer at "the Siegel Diner." We had a good chat. I barely see her anymore. In fact, I barely see most of my friends anymore. I'm just too busy. I don't know when it happened-- when life snuck up on me like that-- or if it's just that I'm trying to keep active friendships going with way too many people. But sometimes, maintaining a social life is exhausting. Tonight I'm going to see some people from AA (looking forward to catching up with Meema and Pixie!) and tomorrow I'm supposed to have dinner with Jake. On Friday, it's off for another day with Sesame and on Saturday I'm going to Long Island (both for a doctor's appointment and to see my mom.) Oh-- and although I didn't report it when it happened, NDN and I welcomed Tamika into our neighborly "alliance." She was inducted on Thursday, October 16th at Zarela. (The crab tostadas were yummmm!)

Anyway-- it all leads me to one big, fat question: WHEN AM I GOING TO DO MY WRITING? It's stressing me out. Writing lesson plans for this British History class is sucking up so much of my time and energy that there's not much left for my paper-writing. Especially when you add in the hours I spend actually teaching, going to AA, working with my sponsee, taking my voice lessons, visiting my family, etc. I only spend the evenings with Narc-- when everything else is through-- but that takes away from my downtime at home. And with my dreams of "apartment therapy" in place, I need that time to putter in my house, to de-clutter and to dust.

Is this post becoming one giant complaint? I didn't intend for it to come out that way. Actually-- life is good right now. Life is very good. I love the Fall. My cheeks feel rosy. I am in love with a new lip gloss; and I am obsessed with Rossetti's painting of "Pandora." What could be better?

Um... what else? I don't know. My hands are cold. I set up a Twitter account, hoping it might unblock my blogger's block. We'll see if it has any effect.

The other night Hud was on TV. Narc and I watched it, even though it kept us up until almost 3:00 AM. I love that movie.

Hud: Man like that sounds no better than a heel.

Alma: Aren't you all?

Hud: Honey, don't go shooting all the dogs 'cause one of 'em's got fleas.

Alma: I was married to Ed for six years. Only thing he was ever good for was to scratch my back where I couldn't reach it.

Hud: You still got that itch?

Alma: Off and on.

Hud: Well let me know when it gets to bothering you.

Question: How did Paul Newman manage to be so damn sparkling?

Hmm...

Anyway, I have to teach again in a few, so I better go get my head in the game and go over my class notes. I hope you are all well out there!

Lots of love,
h